...when your wife is a meth addict and you need the money for baby food

...when it has not completed the surgery. Then you need to kick it's ass to validate that you like women

Fat girls don't have feelings like you or I. They like wearing paper bags in bed and they're just happy to do anything to have someone touch them.

...that looks like your best friend's ex-fiancee and future daughter in-law

What kind of friend doesn't share? Besides, if she's that much of a skank, if it's not you, it's someone else. You're doing him a favor.

...when she's completed the surgery, and she's Jean Grey from the X-Men. Hey, if she looks good enough, and you're ugly, who's to judge.

...when the car is a Lamborghini